Office Object-ivity: I believe I can fly!
Posted: Tuesday, August 17, 2010
by James Banner
Cabinet was on the wall watching Fesame Street when all of a sudden an object smashed through the window. Could it be his mom, who cannot fly to save her soul? No, no it was his long lost friend Stool who he hadn't seen in years. Stool was handsome & carved from cherry wood with a touch of varnish to bring out his color. Stool had edges that were sharp enough to cut bricks. Although on this day Stool was drunk from being tarnished in the yard for so long. There was a grudge between the humans and the Ex- boyfriend aka Ex tossed Stool just inches away from his girlfriend inside. The human shined him up two weeks ago just to be thrown through a window. Go figure. 1 + 1 = 2.
"I did not sleep with that woman," Ex boyfriend said.
"Well why have you been avoiding me for the last couple of weeks? I am sick and tired of these games. Give it up," she screamed with envy. Her pulse was racing, eyes steaming, and frustration was in the air.
It was obvious that the two were not having a good time. Stool just happened to be in the way as Ex was trying to enter the house, but he was too slow because his girlfriend beat him to the door. She ran inside after slapping him twice. He cheated. He has been cheating on me, she thought.
Cabinet was in the living room watching every scene absorbing all the negative energy. He did not want to be a part of this. He slid back just slightly enough to touch wall. On the outside, it was the Ex and Stool who had to battle it out. Stool was standing there upright getting ready to swivel at any moment if ex boyfriend tried to sit down. Stool slid back, and Ex hit the ground. Uh oh, it was on. Ex went left and Stool went right. Ex moved right, Stool moved left. Ex went forward and Stool went backwards. This went on for about 6 minutes and Stool's endurance didn't last. Oh, Stool had a bad smoking habit so his wheels couldn't handle the pressure Ex was giving him. He wimped out, ran out of breath and stood there as still as a squirrel as if it were waiting for a bus to pass by.
Ex picked up Stool tossed him through the window and all you heard was glass shattering. Stool had taken his first flight from the porch to the living room with no autopilot assistance. Luckily he made it through the window with minor bruises and girlfriend was okay. She picked up Stool and asked if he was okay. She was furious and came back with Shotgun and Ex charged up his legs going 100 mph away from the house.
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Top-level comments on this article: (2 total)I was wondering when the next installment was going to come, James :) This episode was excellent, your characterizations are so good, and I found the action riveting!Thanks. I added some humanity into the situation. Twisting things up with humans and objects takes effort.
I liked this James. You have a very unique writing style.Thanks. I try to keep it interesting.
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